Our Self-Written Obituaries – Tanima Saha, Lutyens’s Delhi
The 133rd death.
[Text by Tanima Saha; photo by Christopher Gardner]
Tanima Saha was found dead in her Lutyens’s Delhi residence earlier today by a bunch of schoolboys. Every morning on their way to school the boys would throw stones at Ms Saha’s window blinds to annoy the old lady and she would yell at them. Unaccustomed to going to school without hearing Ms Saha scream at them and with their curiosity piqued, the boys sneaked into her house through her kitchen window.
Ms Saha was found dead sitting in her armchair with her kajal-ed eyes wide open (she had once famously told a friend that she would never be found dead without kajal). She is believed to have died of a heart attack induced by her long-time favourites―greasy Chinese take-out and frozen meals. On her lap was found open Tahmima Anam’s first novel A Golden Age, known to be a personal favourite of Ms Saha’s since the first time she read it as an impressionable teenager. Some other things Ms Saha seems to have been enjoying the night before were a half-empty glass of Chardonnay and a Louis Armstrong record playing on loop on her second-hand record player.
Ms Saha died at the age of 62 after a long career in publishing. She was known to be a passionate, obsessive and talkative person, and rather clumsy in public transport. Constantly active on most social media platforms, she had lost almost all interest in real life and would be mostly found in her pyjamas at home on weekends stalking other people’s social media profiles, if not reading a war tragedy.
Ms Saha’s demise is being much grieved by her group of close girlfriends (much like her favourite TV show Sex and the City), who will be holding a memorial service for her later this week post which they plan to divide among themselves Ms Saha’s massive collection of war novels, old Hindi films and an even bigger collection of designer handbags.
Ms Saha’s desire for the longest time was to write a heart-wrenching first-hand account of a war but alas, she had never witnessed a war herself.
Our Self-Written Obituaries invites people to write their obituary in 200 words. The idea is to share with the world how you will like to be remembered after you are gone. (May you live a long life, of course!) Please mail me your self-obit at mayankaustensoofi@gmail.com.
Be well wherever you are
Hoping to die while drinking Chardonnay is pretentious.