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Our Self-Written Obituaries – Aaditya Vaze, Andheri, Mumbai

The 58th death.

[Text and self-portrait by Aditya Vaze]

Aaditya Vaze, the man known as the founder and figurehead for the great depression of 21st century, died ominously last night, while he was sharpening his pencil. The cause of his death remains unknown and unexplored since the public around him had been waiting for this event for a long time. The cause is irrelevant in the light of joy his death has caused.

Mr Vaze was known to be an excellent orator choosing worst of the things to talk about. This man with an E.Q and memory smaller than a goldfish was famous for his long nose, black and white portraits, and his failures to commit to any sort of responsibility.

He is survived by a stuffed pet dog, a set of knives from across the world and two books–Mice and Men and To Kill A Mockingbird. All his belongings will be donated to the charity that deals with ‘internet addiction’ or will be burnt and ashes thrown down the toilet, as it should be.

Our Self-Written Obituaries invites people to write their obituary in 200 words. The idea is to share with the world how you will like to be remembered after you are gone. (May you live a long life, of course!) Please mail me your self-obit at